can buy lotto tickets legally!
epitome of a princess, or so she thinks ><
constantly in a state of delusion~
self-control needed!
ditto to love joy peace patience kindness goodness faithfulness gentlenes.
home is where the heart is :)
reading in a cafe with yummy food is coolness :)
indecisive. panicky. manjaness.
trying to love,
hoping to bless.
Age is just a number.
Bimbotic behaviour.
White and nerdy. Bitchy under stress.
Has acquired the horrible Singlish accent.
Also the kiasu mentality. Lalala loves attention.
Still growing spiritually.
Acting, debating, MAIL! =D,
eating, shopping and competition.
Still afraid of balloons and
annoyed by silly people.
the one and only.
18 but still the baby of the group.
Random with moodswings. Always having to spell my name for people.
Two left feet. Does not eat lamb.
Can only cook indomee and mashed potatoes well. Shia LaBeouf.
Laughing so hard till I have to catch my breath.
Friends & family. Sleeping in on rainy mornings. Shoes.
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
© Sunshine
I know, I know, third blog of the day. To be expected when you nothing but rot at home. The problem about rotting at home is thinking. You start to think and reflect about things.
In a bout of melancholy, I went to read some of our old archives. It really brings back happier days. That's the word I want to highlight - happier. Even though now that I live overseas and my studies aren't as greek to me as back when I was in Brunei, I'm still not as happy.
I now have the freedom I've always craved. I have the ability to make choices for myself. I have the chance to go where ever I want to go and whatever time I want to. Yet, all these seem lackluster. The days just seem to blend into one long monotonous day. It's as if I never truly sleep. It's as if every night, I take a short nap just to wake up to what I was doing the day before.
Back in SAS (when I did go to school), every day was filled with colour. Even though you had a timetable to follow, everyday seemed unpredictable. For me, every day held anticipation about what little quirk would light up my day. Would it be a funny topic with the girls? Or some lame joke from a friend? Or some unbelievable behaviour from a teacher? These things seem to trivial, but they made my life HAPPY.
Life now seems so... jaded. It's as if someone is filming on 25 fps. The colours are blander and more Eastern European. Blehs. What happened to the crazy colours? When did this transformation happen? How come I wasn't aware of it?
I'm not sure if it's the change of location or just the simple fact of growing up. Life before was full of vibrant colours and bubbles that burst in laughter. I remember promising myself back when I was young that I would never lose my vivaciousness - that I wouldn't need to conform to how society thinks a grown up should be. If I want to be silly and laugh a lot when I'm 21, then so be it.
At 19, I realised that I didn't manage to keep that promise to myself. It turns out that those colours were transient.
cheryl
blogging @
01:52
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